Back is Toast

My lower back is toast.  Well, not that bad now, actually.  I took a nap and was able to get out of bed without much pain so it's on the mend.  This is funny;  I am apparently going to injure every body part in the search for fitness.  I let myself get so out of shape that there is no way I can't injure myself.  This is not pessimism.  This is just the way it's going to be.  I have a certain amount of energy and strength in the now.  My body has worked out a very lazy M.O.  Plus I am carrying around an extra jacket of heavy fat.  Recipe for injuries. 

I'm being careful, really.  I am not going into the gym and trying to lift aggressively.  I am checking the weights, seeing how much I can lift with some effort, and then backing it down to where it gets a bit hard around rep 7 or 8. 

Then, when I get hurt, I have to start all over again.  At least the cardio is working.  I have to take Atenolol for tachycardia (fancy word for a sudden, fast heartbeat) now.  I gave in and called the cardiologist and told him to please call the prescription in after all.  I had refused the drug once, made the pharmacist put it back.  But I suppose I should listen to the doc, and give it a chance.

When you're pushing 50, you're pushing 50. If I don't get into the good groove of diet and exercise now, I never will, and I might not have another chance.

FM took some woman out for Sushi the other night, and a different woman to the movies last night.  He wouldn't tell me whom.  I finally beat the movie person out of him, but it wasn't easy.  I had told him to please go find someone else.  Looks like he's doing so.  Wish him luck.  And wish the poor woman luck too.  She'll need it. >w,eg<

I wrote MetLife a letter today disputing their refusal of my appeal.  Whew.  It's a lame letter but I had to get it done.  One less thing to do.  It would be ever so nice if they would reconsider and send me five grand, but it's not gonna happen.

Ok, gotta call Dad..

184.2

My back just almost went out.  Rassinfrassingarblegrunt...

I worked out anyway.  30 minutes on the cybex elliptical and 30 minutes on the treadmill.  I took a rest in between.  No weights:  I'm too scared to do that with my back threatening me.  Just took a hot shower and am going to lie down with a heating pad.  I suppose I love my life.  I am free to take care of me!

Theodore and Aïda are fighting at night when it is time for me to go to bed.  It has gotten so bad I have to take one or the other into my room and shut the door against the other one.  Last night was Aïda's turn to snuggle with mommy.  Theodore wriggled his way into G's sympathy and got to spend the night on daddy's bed. 

I don't know what to do about their fighting.  Theo won't let Aïda on the bed when he's on it, and if she is on it already he jumps up and runs her off.  She in turn has managed to scratch him up quite a bit.  Honestly!  It's like having feuding 2-year olds in the house.

Yawn

Today I got up and felt like doing nothing.  I went to see mom for a bit, then home and got into bed for a couple hours.  I blew off the gym. 

GSR last night was every bit as riveting and spellbinding as ever (not).  But it was good to be sitting in a room with winners, people who want to serve and who care about the organization. 

Afterwards, FM and I went to Texas Roadhouse where I had an itty bitty piece of steak and some veggies.  I did fall off my diet, though, and ate a couple rolls with butter. 

I'm getting too frustrated with the whole weightloss thing.  I have never had to work so hard to lose a pound.  Six weeks and five pounds.  I'm not building THAT much muscle!  I will keep at it though.  I haven't completely given up although I wish there were someone to whom I could appeal.

It's only ten after six and I'm bored out of my mind.  Reminds me why I had myself on such a rigorous schedule.  I hate being bored.  Nothing on TV but the endless disinformation being provided by CNN and FOX. 

185.0

EDIT:  Please visit Nanny at Nancybratt She is experiencing multisystem failure due to past eating disorder troubles.  She just lost her beloved kitty, Simba aka Timmy. 

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Damn weight isn't budging.  I might have to start keeping a diet diary.  The thought is tedious and tiresome.  Self honesty can be a bitch.  I split my cardio into two pieces today;  used the Cybex elliptical for a half hour and then did my upper body (carefully!) and then on to the treadmill for a half hour again.  I hurt lol.

Tonight is my first GSR meeting in ages, since my previous sober incarnation.  GSR stands for Group Service Rep, and basically means I represent a certain group at the district level.  I wonder if I should be putting any of this in print.  Anyway, it can be boring and political but it's also interesting and a nice way to be of service. 

They always have cookies there.  Uh oh.

MetLife's denial of my request for reinstatement of my long-term disability benefits is still sitting on my desk.  I was going to pick it apart line by line and re-appeal but for some reason I am just not motivated.  I have nothing to lose and a lot to gain.  I guess they are counting on a universal dislike of paperwork.

Ok, off to eat some vegetables...

184.2

I ran into a helpful fellow at the gym today.  He's a free-lance personal trainer and was really just doing what he liked to do, help people work out.  He said that doing an hour on the treadmill lost its fat-burning efficiency after 30 minutes, and that I should break it into two half-hour sessions, working with weights in between.  So maybe that would yield more in the way of results as my weight loss has been s-l-o-w.

He's not allowed to charge for services at Planet Fitness and he said he really wasn't trying to get me to work with him.  I guess some people are just nice.  That kind of made my day.  Oh, and he also said I should use the Cybex machine and that the treadmill is murder on my knees.  I'll give it a try tomorrow.

After that I went and got my nails done.  They look mahvelous.

I really had no oomph this morning to get going, missed my noon meeting because of the darned diner last night - too much coffee again - but will salvage the day with a meeting tonight and NO DINER.

Ok, off to visit a few subs before meeting time...